Rose Colored Glasses

I'm sure you can guess by the title what this blog is going to be about. But wait! It's unconventional. It's weird. It's oddly comfortable and yet pushes me to be better. It's a strange mix of everything I always said I'd never want and everything I've always dreamed of.
That's right; it's my relationship.
First of all it needs be said: I'm everything but idealistic. So in case you were afraid that this was going to be just another teenage girl moment of severe oozing I'd like to put you at ease: it's not.
The fact is that I over think practically everything. Consider this: I thought about getting my current hairstyle for two years. I considered my first tattoo design for one year before actually getting it. So it's fair to say that I'm not impulsive.
God is first in my life. He's the first that knows everything. He's the one I ask about my decisions. He's the first I talk to immediately after realizing a mistake. Therefore it's also fair to say that I'm not without conviction.
I'm the sort of person that before asking your opinion on anything I know my opinion. Before I ask "what do you think?" I already know what I think. So yes, I am obstinate and stubborn. However, it protects me from caring so much about other peoples opinions that I allow their approval to govern my actions.
Now that I've spent a moment in preface let me get to my point: I've actually fallen for someone. This coming from the woman who didn't date all through high school because I couldn't stand the immaturity of the guys in my bubble of conversation.
I realized this morning that I was wearing rose colored glasses. I had been sitting in a car for an hour and half and I looked at the sky and thought "God, that is so beautiful."
I now believe that rose colored glasses in the right tint allow us to see the world as it was meant to be in a sense. I can remember when I first encountered Christ. I haven't seen things the same since that moment.
Now I've found someone who might very well be the man God planned for me to be with and I've gotten a deeper pinkish hue to my glasses. What a beautiful world we're living in!
However I am not naive. There are people throughout this world suffering. There are people in anguish not only physically but also emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. The worse part is they're not all an ocean's distance away. Some are my neighbors; my friends; my family; people whom I love. My life is first about Christ and second about people. Before marriage and after marriage that will be my life and my calling: love God, love people. -Agape

Once Upon a Time...

Once upon a time everything was black and white: now I have an entire color scheme staring me in the face. I used to be an A-B student: now I have failed two tests consecutively in the same class. Friends used to share their lives with me and I would share mine with them: now we just "visit." Life once felt too routine: now it feels like one big chunk of chaos fell on top of my head and I'm struggling to grapple with it. I fell in love with a friend and was happy to be so: he told me I was like a sister to him.
Change....it's either evil or wonderful. It all depends on how you look at it. The way I see it; it's necessary, so why see it as evil? Sometimes it hurts worse then it does other times.
I used to let my emotions control me: now I've decided that regardless of all this, I will hold fast to joy. I have something that I'm striving toward. There's a plan that's laid out for my life and it's what I want to see come to life. In the eye of the storm, I will find calm. In the desert I know where to find everlasting water. For any foolishness I know where to find forgiveness. In the darkness, I hold onto the light of the world.
My life is not my own, so who am I to complain? This life is not about me and my intent is to allow myself to be used to show the glory of God. If the trees and flowers can do it, then how much more can I who was made in His image and blessed with a relationship with Him. Where does my hope come from? My God, my King, my Savior, my Best Friend, my Comforter, my Light, my Guide, my Meaning, my Everything.

(Note: The image isn't mine. It belongs to http://outwardlyupward.deviantart.com/ )